Brier Jirka is a sex therapist with the Methodist Physicians Clinic Women's Center. She blogs every other Tuesday for livewellnebraska.com. Read more from Brier here.
You know it as soon as you hear it.
THE song that brings back memories of a special moment between you and your partner. That moment when fireworks exploded and you knew love was in the air.
The fact that music has such a prominent place in our relationships should not be surprising. We all listen to music on a daily basis, and a person's taste can vary from classical or rock to country, pop or R&B.
For some, that special song is anything by the band Boston or ever popular REO Speedwagon. For others it could be by Marvin Gaye or one of today's superstars – Usher, Carrie Underwood, or dare I say Justin Bieber!
But have you ever thought about how much music actually influences your sexual behavior?
It's a common question I hear in sex therapy: What music should I play to set the mood?
“Let's Get It On” or “Sexual Healing” usually come to mind right away. However, an article on the subject published in Softpedia noted research which showed those that enjoy jazz music have 34 percent more sex than those who like pop music.
The least sexually active group – those who prefer classical, like Bach or Beethoven.
So what gives? Blame brain functions. The left hemisphere is linked to language and the right to our feelings. Music often triggers both at the same time, resulting in stronger outward behavior, AKA movement. Simply put, music encourages touching.
Both men and women rate tactile (touching) stimuli as most important in sexual arousal. However, when it comes to musical stimuli, men are often less responsive than women.
For men, the type of music doesn't really matter. But for females, “her song" will likely result in positive thoughts and feelings.
Next time you want to set the mood for love, consider what your partner's ears prefer.
And in case nothing comes to mind, here is a list of songs that may help set the mood, followed by those which will ruin your chances for intimacy.
This list was generated from a combination of online polls and my professional suggestions.
Top 5 Mood Setters
• I'll Make Love to You (Boyz II Men)
• Come A Little Closer (Dierks Bentley)
• Shook Me All Night Long (AC/DC)
• Too Afraid to Love You (The Black Keys)
• Feel Like Making Love (Bad Company)
• I've Got You Under My Skin (Frank Sinatra)
Top 5 Mood Spoilers
• How You Remind Me (Nickelback)
• Boyfriend (Justin Bieber)
• I Wanna Sex You Up (Color Me Badd)
• I'll Do Anything for Love (Meatloaf)
• Anything Disney – seriously it's wrong to mix sexual intimacy and Disney music